Consent, Responsibility and the X Card

Consent

Ultimately, consent is all about having fun. We’re all in this hobby to have fun; but we’re all different in terms of what we find fun and at what level of intensity. That’s not weird or wrong, that’s just life! Problems can arise, though, when different people at a table have a gaming different expectation of what is “okay”, and what is “over the line”. Some folks find it hard to speak up, and spend time being miserable in a game that they’re really not enjoying. We find that thought particularly uncool. In some games (thankfully not any that we’re aware of here), other players will just demand that a freaked-out player just “man up”. We find the idea of that completely gross and unacceptable.

As a result, we believe that everyone playing in a game at the club have the following consent rights:

  1. The default for your consent is “no” – basically, anything that happens requires your consent.
  2. You get to decide where your boundaries lie; no-one else can decide for you.
  3. Anyone is allowed to leave a situation that they feel is uncomfortable at any time.
  4. No-one needs to explain why they’re not consenting.
  5. You can change your mind about your consent at any time.
  6. Your consent is not up for debate.

And above all – NO-ONE is to blame if something makes them feel uncomfortable. This isn’t just a club thing, it’s currently a hot topic in the games industry as a whole. The team at Monte Cook Games have written a short supplement which describes the issues very well. You can read it by clicking the button below.

Game Classification

To help with working out what might cause you concern, we have introduced ratings for the games that we run! The gamesmasters will provide a rating for a number of categories which you can use to help decide if a particular game is for you. The higher the rating, the more mature or complex the game.

You can see the categories by clicking on the link here.

The X Card

All this is well and good ahead of sitting down to play; but what if something during a game session makes you feel uncomfortable? After all, the club is a place where you sit down to play with a group of people you may not know particularly well. What happens if it gets a bit too much for you? Well, that’s where the X Card comes in. Raise or tap your X Card. You don’t have to explain why – it doesn’t matter why.

When an X Card is activated, your group simply edit out anything that has been X Carded. And if there’s a need, the group can take a break; you can have a private chat with the gamesmaster about what’s troubling you; whatever is needed to resolve the issue that you’re having.

The purpose of the X Card isn’t to replace conversation or to push boundaries until someone squeaks; it’s a low-intrusion system to ensure that everyone at the table can have fun, at the level of intensity that is okay for them.

To learn much more about the X Card, check out the document from its creator, John Stavropoulos.

Responsibility

In a club the size of the Knights of Trinity, it can be tricky for the members of the Council to keep all the plates spinning that they need to so that you can come along, sit down and play games. As a result, there are a few things that the Council would ask to help them to help you – and most of them are “common sense”.

Communication

It’s kind of a big thing in this hobby and even more important when running a club. So, going forward, if you are going to be absent you need to message a member of the Council or the page to let us know, as soon as possible. For players, this stops your GM and fellow players hanging around, waiting on someone who is not going to turn up. For GM’s, we as a Council need to know if you aren’t coming so we can try accommodate your players, either with emergency games or sliding them into an open space.

We would ask that, if you are someone who is wanting to run a game, that you seriously consider if you can commit to the full term. Now we’re not expecting you to get off your death bed or haul yourself in after being hit by a car. But if you know there’s a chance your game will be interrupted, either from work or holidays, you give consideration to that fact.

Finally, with regard to communication we would ask players that you let your GM know if you are a later arrival. As you know we’ve grow quite a bit over the past year and so nobody knows everybody’s schedule- there are folk here from 4-ish and folk who turn up at 7. So if you are a late arrival, tell your GM- it will allow them to know when to start and when to hang fire.

Consent

Gamesmasters have a little task to do before you ask us to advertise your game. Your game will need to go through the ratings system and we do expect you to use the tagging to warn anyone of anything that might feature that is outside the basic ratings.

We also expect everybody to abide by the consent rules above – and that includes both GMs and players. If your character’s actions are getting too harrowing for some folk the X Cards will be there for everyone, and usable without blame.

Anyone ignoring the policy will be taken through the disciplinary measures outlined in the club charter. You can find links to them below.

Consideration

At the end of the day, all of this is about respect and consideration for one another. We are all here to have fun, we are all here to have a good time.

So we’d ask you to keep things in mind. Come prepared for the game – your GM is not your mum and can’t always be guaranteed to have the 200 d6’s needed for Shadowrun.

Give your GM your attention – they’ve put work in to bring your something, least we can do is give them that.

And always remember that there’s nothing worse when you are at a table and feel left out. Reach out to your fellow players, particularly if you see them looking isolated or bored.

Gamesmasters – tell us if you have preferences for where you’d like to be located, particularly if you think your game might get into some things that people at other tables might find uncomfortable. And do tell us if you have an idea for a game you’d like to run, but it’s better for a smaller group – we’ll see what we can do to accommodate you!